Phew! It’s been a busy month settling back in at Macquarie. I was hoping to most more frequently than this, but things are finally quietening down and now I might actually be able to get into a routine with it.
Since my last post, a month ago, I’ve met my supervisors twice. At our first meeting, they listened to my adjustment anxiety in returning to research, and particularly the feeling of being overwhelmed by the mounting tasks and expectations ahead. They said I had nothing to worry about. I’ve got the research skills. Everything else is just admin. It’s their job to guide me through it. Surprisingly, this worked, and I feel more confident about what lies ahead.
We discussed my non-thesis goals — publishing, teaching and studying abroad — which they agreed were sensible.
The first step towards publishing is to convert my master’s thesis into an article for submission to journals. My supervisors suggested targeting American journals because the word limits are typically more generous, so I’d spend less time editing it down.
Rapid progress has also been made towards a joint PhD or cotutelle arrangement because my principal supervisor has a contact at my desired partner institution who is enthusiastic about co-supervising my project. The main challenge is funding, because my stipend won’t follow me abroad.
A recurring theme has been ‘change.’ I’ve started sounding like a broken record, but things have changed at Macquarie in the few years I’ve been away.
Perhaps the most obvious difference is the Law School’s new home in the Michael Kirby Building, which replaced something distinctly more Soviet. The new building is light and spacious, with lots of glass and wood and a spiral staircase.
More profound is the social element. I completed both my Master of Laws and Master of Research during the early years of the COVID-19 pandemic. I was a couple of weeks into my second semester when everything went remote. Classes went online and exams were done from home. Suddenly I was studying solo.
With grades good enough for a scholarship, I went on to do the MRes. I met my supervisor only three times across the entire year. As far as I’m aware, there was just one other graduate researcher in my MRes cohort doing law, and I only met him at a few scheduled events.
The contrast has been immediate. Instead of being isolated, my supervisors suggested I spend at least two days a week on campus. I’ve already attended a welcome afternoon tea at the Law School, and a monthly law research students potluck lunch.
On top of which, I’ve seen a lot more of my fellow researchers, because now I have my own desk.
At our first meeting, my supervisors asked me if I had been assigned a workspace yet. I said I didn’t even know I was entitled to a workspace; I hadn’t had one as an MRes student. They were quite insistent that I speak to someone at the Law School to get it arranged. Two days later, the law research student representative also asked if I had keycard access to the building yet; the thought hadn’t occurred to me.
Everybody seems to think I’m relaxed because I’m not bothered by these things. My response has been that I’m probably relaxed about the things that matter, and anxious about the things that don’t. The reality is that having a workspace and keycard access are not as important to me as doing the research. It doesn’t matter to me how big and shiny and new the Law School is, or how many chilled water taps it has, I can happily work anywhere.
At any rate, I spoke to someone about it and there was no movement, so I took the passive aggressive route of sitting in one of the common areas until someone noticed. Almost immediately the Dean walked past, said hello, and asked if I’d been assigned a workspace yet. I said I hadn’t, so she led me upstairs to her office and introduced me to someone whose title I can’t quite remember but whose job it is to essentially run the administrative side of the Law School. After some tapping on the computer I was handed a temporary fob because my keycard wasn’t authorised yet, and led back downstairs to choose a desk.
Being asked to choose a desk is worse than it sounds. There were about six spots open. How does one choose? A window or no window? Windows mean natural lights and views, but also heat and distraction. Do I conform to the inexplicably segregated male and female desk clusters? In the end, I chose the first desk on the left, by the window. Desk 2–1–A. I even have a little lockable filing cabinet.
Unfortunately, socialising does not come very easy to me, but I am trying. I’ve quickly made friends with my new colleagues, including the other PhD student at the other end of my desk, and have already had several long and engaging conversations about all of their research projects.
There are a couple of reasons I find social situations uncomfortable. For one, I stick out. I’m tall and overweight, with long hair and a beard. Even sitting, I’m conscious of towering over people. You would be forgiven for thinking JK Rowling was describing me when she wrote,
He was almost twice as tall as a normal man and at least five times as wide. He looked simply too big to be allowed, and so wild – long tangles of bushy black hair and beard hid most of his face, He had hands the size of trash can lids, and his feet in their leather boots were like baby dolphins.
If Hagrid wore glasses, I’d be his spitting image.
I also have a name that makes people do a double-take. Fortunately my brother’s partner gave me a friendship bracelet with my name on it, so if there’s any confusion I just hold that up to be read. It does, however, have some benefits.
At the Law School afternoon tea, one of my new colleagues, who was sitting next to me, also had an unusual name. When she heard my name, she said that up until last year she had a dog named Mozart. I said that was an unusual name for a dog. I’ve already gotten good mileage out of this anecdote.
In addition to these shenanigans, I attended a guest seminar on European lawyers who migrated to Australia immediately before and after the Second World War. There wasn’t much in it relevant to my own research, but it was fascinating to hear about the difficulties they had in re-qualifying to practise law or finding academic positions. Apparently during this time, Australia was not particularly welcoming to lawyers and academics without a common law background, so most ended up in unrelated industries and professions. The rejection of so much intellectual talent is tragic.
Apart from that, I’ve been to two workshops on research writing. The first was on literature reviews, something with which I struggle enormously because I get bogged down in the details of scholarly works. It wasn’t as helpful as I’d hoped, but I’ve applied some of the tips to my own work to moderate success. The second was on developing research questions. This isn’t something I have a problem with, but it was still good to pick up some more pointers. There are, I believe, eight more to go.
Lastly, I attended a data management plan orientation session. Every doctoral student is expected to submit a DMP with their Confirmation of Candidature, which is due at the six month mark to show that we’ve developed a viable and worthwhile research project. I’m still a little bit fuzzy on what a DMP for law would look like, but I’ll post about the square-peg-in-a-round-hole nature of legal research in the near future.
Ahead of me this week is another meeting with my supervisors on Wednesday, followed by a welcome morning tea held by the Faculty of Arts on Thursday. The immediate priority is the Confirmation of Candidature, which the welcome event should cover.
Until next time!